Nameless Relation

I made you read something about somebody and that made me think what about you. I should write something. I remember most of the people whom I crossed path with. That guy who doing MBBS from AFMC I met in train. That little boy who had come home who was going for his engineering and was anxious to know about the city. That lady I met on train was interested in me meeting her son and insisted I get down at her station. That Sanskrit professor in train who would converse in Sanskrit. Those bunch of friends who bumped me twice in train.

And all those people who stayed there for longer. All of them were steps forward. Everyone taught me something. Some good lessons, some bitter but everyone made me better.

And now about you. It is too early to write. What I write here may change tomorrow. My experiences with you will have new aspects if it continues. But I feel we will go a longer way than others ...Or maybe we won’t- that only time will tell.

I met you when I was going through a tough phase. I had made a Celebrity my escape route. Spend time in watching his movies, read his interviews and watched his interviews. He was there in my dreams where he offered to work with me on my story. All this seemed so good till you came in- out of nowhere. And because of you I came out of the dream world and I realized what I had been missing. My real life, the office life, I had thought IT is not my cup of tea but I realized, it is what I want. I kind of took pride in telling people what I do.  I can’t say how you contributed but you did something. I don’t know if I would be able to go back in that world but thanks for making me understand and realize what I had been craving for. The anger in me was because I missed that routine of calls, the planning, the daily standups, retrospective, refinement Go how I miss the discussions with client- the part I did so well- Client handling.

I saw a hope that you would help me out of this mess. But I know it is not easy. Even if you don’t try, I would just be a little sad, nothing else. It won’t change much.  Because if you really help me, I would never be able to repay you, I have nothing to give you. You already have achieved a lot. I haven’t come even the half way. I know and only I know how I survived and kept this job going for so long, taking in obligation even after slogging so hard, giving my promotions and credits to someone else.

It was frustrating and the people who could not even write a simple sql query were sitting on my head. I know it was frustrating and maybe I showed and I gave up. I should not have.

My dear friend I don’t know what is in your mind but I am not a dream queen I am just a simple girl who is lacking behind a lot and my confidence goes for a toss when someone asks me about how much I achieved in my life.

Looks – No I don’t even have them now. I have grown old to achieve more. At times I feel to give it up but then I don’t want to. I want to try till I can.

I just realized I did not speak a word about you. About you- Well I feel you are just perfect person to be made friend. The kind of people I really like, serious about their work, conscious about the family. Do not get carried away and decent.

I really don’t know if this friendship will happen but I know if it will, it would be fun. We have so much interests that are common and we can do so many things together. 

God bless you.